Monday, November 14, 2011

Frustrated

I have not done well over the past few days. 

The holiday spirit is affecting me and as a result I have spent a lot of money that I shouldn't have on things I just don't need. 

Over the weekend, I got into our garage and started sorting things out.  I made my way through bags upon bags of things I had stashed in the garage - hidden from my husband.  Craft supplies, books, bags from thrift stores.  As I made piles - things to take to Goodwill, boxes of the girls' clothes to share among friends, and a huge box to donate to Toys for Tots - I realize how sick I am and how this addiction has me in it's grip.   All that money - gone.

I did bite the bullet and listed some items for sale on eBay.  It's not much, but it's a start.  I also listed a bunch of books on a swap site.  If I build up credits, then I can use them instead of cash to satisfy that affair that I have with books.  I deposited money into my postage account so that I'm able to mail the books this week.  I just need to follow through.  I have a problem with following through with my obligations -- which spills over into paying bills.

We finally sold my husband's car.  The cash we received will be used toward new tires for my vehicle.  My husband is holding the money because I just know that I would spend it if left to my control.

We also have a plan for his extra military pay.  When it is deposited, we will go straight to the bank, withdraw it and put it into an envelope that he will hold (hide from me).  That money will be used for Christmas.

I have also decided to challenge myself and take my debit card out of my wallet.  I have $10 in cash in there -- and that will be enough -- because, just for today, I DO NOT NEED ANYTHING.

Because of my splurge, I have to reset my debt clock.  I didn't even make it a week.  So frustrated and disappointed.

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