Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Brain Dump

A bit of a brain dump this morning....
*  I have not left the house since the day before New Year's Eve.  Realistically, I know I can't hole myself up and watch the world go by.  But I feel accomplished because I have not compulsively shopped since then either.  I am deleting all the "shopping" emails that come into my mailbox.  I have thrown away catalogs.  I have not yet taken the step to throw away the coupons that I get from the craft stores.  Crafting keeps me sane and is much cheaper than therapy.  However, I have a tendency to go overboard with supplies. 
*  My checking account is overdrawn - again.  I can't get a handle on my numbers yet until I know exactly what I'm dealing with.  I probably have to wait another day or two to wait for the dust to settle and then revisit that checking account and start from scratch.
*  On the upside of having an overdrawn account -- I am learning that I can do without and that I can be creative -- both with spending time with my girls and my family and with my grocery budget.  This morning I went through my freezer and made a list of everything in there.  I probably have a month's worth of food in there.  And I haven't even gone through the deep freezer in our garage yet.
*  Last night, I couldn't sleep.  Worries over money kept me awake and practically in tears all night.  I happened to come across an episode of Dr. Phil that I taped yesterday.  It was about watching your money.  How ironic, I thought.  So many things they mentioned, I can do.  Some things I already do.  It inspired me to challenge myself more. 
*  I received a number of gift cards for Christmas.  I'm hoarding them.  I don't know why.  I have no need for new clothes or jewelry.  I will probably hold on to them and buy my girls school clothes and/or summer clothes with them.  I received 2 Starbucks gift cards.  I haven't had a Starbucks in weeks -- and I resist using them.  I have a Safeway grocery card for $25 that I'm holding on to for an "emergency".  My brother sent my girls $50 each in a Toys R Us gift card.  Hubby and I decided to put those away until next Christmas.  They've already received so many toys and other items -- we'll just use them for next Christmas's gifts.
*  I set up two automatic bill payments over the past few days.  One for our cell phone and one for our internet.  Both were at a $0 balance, so at least I'm starting fresh with those.  Still need to set up the cable, water, and electric.
*  Yesterday I started a "Reading the Bible in 90 Days" program.  I have been on this faith journey for awhile -- trying to give up the control and put my faith and trust in God.  In the past 24+ hours since I've started the program, every where I look, I find words of encouragement and faith - whether it's on Facebook, an email from a friend or just something I come across.  It is encouraging me.
Slowly....one day at a time.  I didn't get in this mess overnight, and it's not going to go away overnight either.